En Route To Salem, Oregon...

Currently I am sitting in the back of the van driving from boise, idaho to salem, oregon. The trip today should be roughly 8 hours. Yesterday, beth and I drove a 10 hour day through the entire gauntlet of weather, and hazardous driving conditions...we came out of it a bit punchy at the end, but today we get to relax in the back and if we go over a bridge, at least no one can blame us. :)

I’ve been a bit of a slacker when it comes to documenting the really cool things that have been going on, so here’s a bit of a recap...

TEXAS

texas is big. Because of this, we had a lot of driving to do...I took the opportunity to perfect my george w. bush accent. I feel confident enough to add it to my resume...although I won’t. Apparently, and stop me if you already know this...texas has camels and zebras I was sitting in the back of the van with scot, and I see his eyes go wonkie...all’s he can get out of his mouth is “camels. Camels. Fucking camels ” Priceless, considering he’s the most eloquent one of the bunch. We drove back by the camels the next day and also saw zebras I guess I was so surprised by the dromedaries that I missed the zebras entirely...good thing we had to pass by them twice.

while we were in texas, we got word from the production office that one of the schools that had seen our show that morning had faxed a GLOWING review of us to our head honcho saying how we were the best cast the teachers had ever seen come through there, and how the kids agreed it was the best field trip they’d ever been on. This made us happy...so happy in fact, that meagan and I skipped down to the pool where scot was to tell him the good news...then I threw meagan in.

KANSAS

flattest state in the union There is nothing...seriously nothing. Not just a lack of scenery, but actually devoid of everything. I made the comment, as a dark cloud moved over the desolate countryside, that perhaps, the Nothing from THE NEVER ENDING STORY had beaten us there, and had in fact, sucked up all the beauty kansas once had...crops, livestock, color, trees, hills, hope...everything. I mean damn. Oh yeah, and I parked next to the weinermobile!

OKLAHOMA

I know I commented on this already, but I find it ironic that a place founded on the basis of bettering one’s self through the love of the lord our god, could be so lacking in humanity. I’m speaking of course of the day we played ORAL ROBERTS UNIVERSITY. The basketball court of the university to be specific. Although all of the reports from other stage managers from tours past had expressly warned against ever playing that venue again, chamber booked it for us. Nice. The space is huge, something like 6000 seat arena, but it was impossible to give them a good show. The angle of the seats to the “stage” was so extreme, that I was spitting on the front row (and practically sitting on their laps) trying to project and hit the back of the house, but I’m pretty sure the last 3rd of the seats saw us as little specks hopping around like assholes, and not much else. Ah well. The crew was passive aggressive (sans the cutie sophomore named tyler...we wanted to wrap him up and give him to beth for her birthday- which was the same day). Even at the hotel, and the restaurant we stopped at for lunch, the people were less than hospitable. And we usually have incredibly good luck with meeting friendly people. Oklahoma was not the case.

MISSOURI (twice)








we spent a weekend in kansas city, mo and had a GREAT time We stayed at a holiday inn express and it was like sleeping on clouds...I swear to god Plus, they read my and meagan’s minds...they don’t have comforters on the beds (we always rip them off ‘cause they’re gross, and then check for bedbugs...ya never know.) We were in the heart of all the cool happenin’s that weekend. There was a pub crawl to cure cancer that the frats and sororities were doing...they were fun to laugh at. We all ate the hell out of some really good food...thai, indian, cheesecake factory...then we all got gussied up and hit the bars ourselves. We weren’t kidding around either...we started with martinis at one bar, then switched to liquor at the next. I introduced scot to the IRISH CAR BOMB and we all did way too many of them (but hey, they are yummy ). There was some footsie under the table with me and meagan, and we all got pretty chummy...even zach who is never eager to look like an asshole with the rest of us, joined in the frivolity.

NEBRASKA

we only stayed the night in kearney, ne, and so there’s not much to report. But it was the evening of Friday the 13th, and some weird shit had gone down earlier in the day. A huge cart took it upon itself to roll off the truck at full speed and crash on the concrete alleyway, but not before crushing scot’s toe...

So that night at dinner, lanny, myself, scot and meagan, went to ruby tuesdays. But our chi’s were all off and it didn’t make for a good outing. Buttons were pushed, we were all cranky, and I was very happy to get back to the hotel, crawl into bed and see the clock strike 12:01 on the 14th.

COLORADO






we had a really tough week in colorado. We were in a shabby hotel with nothing around it, but we did make the most of it. We took a shuttle into downtown to go out to dinner on chamber’s tab (they dropped the ball the week before and left us in the lurch, so they bought us dinner...but with a $20 cap). So we hit up cheesecake factory because there’s 8 of us, and the menu could satisfy everyone’s palette...unless you’re just fussy. We got loaded and stuffed, and were happy. As long as food is involved we do pretty well at not letting tempers flare up with each other. :) afterwards, some took the shuttle right back to the hotel, but some of us stayed downtown for a while. We walked around, there were a lot of horse-drawn carriage rides going on, and I met a cowboy His name was brad, and he and his dog, kip, and horse, ted, were a carriage ride team He was a sweet kid from iowa, who was proud to be a redneck, and worked at a country western bar making cowboy hats and there was a mechanical bull Some of us tried to get down there because he had recommended it, and I’ve been starving for some local culture, but alas, it didn’t work out. But it sure sounded fun.

After our first performance in denver, we got our first taste of winter As soon as the show closed, and we were loading out or stuff, the snow started falling. And falling, and falling. Lots of big huge fat flakes It covered the ground, and our set, and us. It made for a slippery load out, but I was far too giddy to be bothered. We then drove to colorado springs for a show the next day. It snowed all afternoon, and through the evening. Realizing we all had been caught totally off-guard, some of us trekked on foot to the target down the street from our hotel. We bought the hell out of their winter stock. I had a big coat and scarf, but didn’t bring snow boots. So I got boots, fingerless gloves, and 2 hats Beth and meagan went balls out and bought everything in sight They now look so totally adorable when they suit up for the winter. :) also, they thought ahead to the long drive (which I am currently on now) and bought us girls crayons and coloring books They’re awesome

WYOMING

tundra in rawlins, wy... scariest woman in a pizza hut ever, other guy at other pizza hut in diamondville/kemmerer, wyoming was COOLEST guy ever!! Cool tarot-esque stickers from aforementioned pizza hut (mine said “you need a spanking”) longest driving ever...1400 miles in 2 ½ days

IDAHO

boise...what can I say?

OREGON

so so so pretty!! The mountains are gorgeous!! We’re here for a few days, bouncing back and forth between oregon and washington. Salem, or is a cute little town. Portland, or is cool, although I was too sick in bed to enjoy it. But those who went out said it was cool.

The crazy crap from last week has calmed down a bit, although I think it’s left a bitter taste in our mouths. Lanny, our stage manager, leaves us tomorrow after the show, and we get someone we don’t altogether trust has our interim stage manager until our real replacement arrives next week. Fingers crossed!!

Please don’t get me wrong, amidst all the hellish crap we’ve put up with I’ve made some life long friends. Beth, our house manager/ sound person/ understudy referred to us as “war buddies”...a type of friendship forged in the harshest of circumstances, that few others understand, and that will bond you forever. I’m ok with that.